Are you acquainted with spoiled, airhead, belligerent, obnoxious and
rude children? Even worse, are you related to them? Are you so
stressed out with trying to gain cooperation, that there is little time
for fun or expressions of love? Is your interaction more of a
battleground than peaceful co-existence?
If
so, here are 7 tips to help you regain an attitude of mutual respect.
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The
word discipline comes from disciple, which means to guide, lead and
teach. You cannot teach when you are yelling.
-
All
goals of misbehavior are based on unmet needs:
-
To
gain attention
-
To
gain power
-
To
gain revenge
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To
gain sympathy
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If
you want to figure out what the child is trying to accomplish, look
at how you are reacting. What are your feelings?
-
The
best way to change a child's behavior is to change how you react. Figure
out who owns the problem and don't take it personally. Withdraw from
power struggles
-
Being
firm and kind in stating what is acceptable and unacceptable
behavior helps everyone to know what the boundaries are.
-
Establishing
natural and logical consequences helps reinforce any teaching
method.
-
Be
consistent in discipline. We all work better when we know the
ground rules and what is expected of us.
Children
who have loving rules and boundaries established and practiced in a firm
and kind way by the adults in their life are secure. They have a
foundation of mutual respect and learn to build satisfying relationships
with others.
When they do not have guidelines for appropriate behavior, they spend
their time pushing out or going inward rather than growing in self
confidence.
Is
it too late to establish rules for mutual respect? No. Never stop
trying.
Not if the child is 4, 14, 24 or 44. Guiding young people into
productive, contributing lives is what the adults in their circle of
influence are supposed to do. To do less, is to cheat them and the
world of what they have to offer.
If
you are having problems that need more attention, please see
this simple proven system that will end
the frustrations you are experiencing with your kids.
